1. goddamn the pusherman
2. never skip leg day
3. don’t ever talk to the cops
4. before you move into rental property video tour the entire place and close up on problems
5. don’t drink and climb things
6. don’t drink and swim
7. don’t drink and drive
8. take a picture of any paper you need to save
9. don’t talk to kids unless their parents are present
10. don’t move heavy stuff, especially for money
11. record phone calls
12. don’t borrow money
13. if you get into a fight with strangers, avoid falling down
14. when the cops are attacking you, try to get in a fetal position with your head under a car
15. friendly is better than smart
16. superhero movies are for idiots
17. casinos are for idiots
18. professional sports are for idiots
19. everything on television is scripted to control the idiots